When faced with negative feedback our common reaction is to immediately defend ourselves with our own rationale. But what if we took a moment to really dig into that feedback, understand what it’s telling us, and use it as a catalyst for improvement?
Negative feedback is usually a result of disappointment.
Negative feedback typically comes when we’ve fallen short of expectations. But let’s not forget that testing things, making mistakes and learning along the way is a crucial part of solving problems.
Remember Wayne Gretzky’s wise words: “You miss 100% of the shots you don’t take.” Let’s embrace the feedback and see where it can take us.
The nature and source of negative feedback needs to be understood and resolved.
Instead of shooting the messenger, let’s focus on what the feedback is saying. Take economists predicting gloom and doom, for instance. They underestimated factors like consumer behavior, post-pandemic recovery, and the increased participation of women in the workforce. Preschool, for example, is a game-changer for working mothers.
The basis of negative feedback needs to be understood.
Understanding the root of negative feedback is key. The pandemic has thrown data into chaos, with more volatility than we’re used to. We need to scrutinize the sources, consistency, demographics, and how we measure it all. Factors like climate change, politics, demographics, and uncertainty affect our data parameters. Does anyone really think Taylor Swift’s attendance at games is boosting the Kansas City Chief’s scores?
How much do bias and opinion affect negative feedback?
Bias and opinion play a big role in how we perceive negative feedback. Entrepreneurs often have unwavering faith in their ventures despite the harsh reality that 90% of startups fail within five years. Sports fans are no different, believing their team can win even when odds are stacked against them. Go Bears!
Bias creeps in when we ignore relevant information, especially when it comes to social and environmental issues. But the simplest things, like saying “please” and “thank you” and asking people “how are you?” can go a long way in building relationships. And bias is highly influenced by circumstances – getting pulled over by a cop feels very different from seeing one protect a place of worship.
Focus on facts rather than opinions or the general nature of the source.
We need to shift our focus from opinions and the source’s general nature to facts. Negative feedback can be valuable and constructive, regardless of how it’s delivered. We must address issues like crime, prejudice, climate change, hatred and safety collaboratively and without political bias. We need to take context into account. For example, when it comes to parenting, supporting toddlers learning to walk is a far cry from teaching teens to drive.
Recognize the existence of the individual agenda.
Let’s take the work-from-home debate. Arguments for and againstoften boils down to personal situations and opinions rather than hard facts. For people with long commutes and individually focused jobs, productivity and satisfaction can be improved by working from home. In contrast, jobs that require significant interaction and collaboration benefit more from working together in an office environment. However, the real question should be about productivity and what it means in each context, a question that often seems to be missing from the conversation.
We need to focus on the positive and not just the negatives.
Let’s also celebrate the positives, not just dwell on the negatives. Drunk driving, heart attacks, women’s rights, civil rights, safety, and smoking have all seen significant improvements in recent years. More women are becoming CEOs (currently 15% at public companies), and road fatalities have declined drastically. We should channel our energy into breaking down barriers and seizing opportunities to do more to support these and similar efforts than focus energy on the negatives.
Focus on solutions and not excuses.
Fear, uncertainty, unrealistic goals, and a reluctance to accept mistakes can all lead to excuses. In contrast, embracing risk, maintaining confidence, learning from errors, accepting the unknown, and setting clear, achievable goals can vastly improve performance.
Understand, monitor and react to negative feedback.
Lastly, we need to understand, monitor, and react to negative feedback. It’s too easy to ignore, forget, or downplay the negatives in areas like health, performance, climate, and safety. We need to acknowledge these issues and continue to support positive practices. For example, staying home when sick is becoming a more accepted practice than spreading illness at work or at school.
In Anne Duke’s book Quit, she discusses how terms like grit, persistence, confidence are common management recommendations. She says, “Grit can get you to stick to hard things that are no longer worthwhile. The trick is figuring out the difference.”
However, terms like quit, fail, lose, etc. all have negative connotations. For example, when I was a new consultant at SCORE, I expressed my disappointment at the large number of people we were unable to help. The response was, “One of the best things we do at SCORE is to help people keep their day jobs”, as if the mere desire to quit a day job to strike out on one’s own was something to squash.
Measurement is also a critical tool for evaluating success, failure and potential. For example, I’m type 2 diabetic and have blood tests done every three months to adjust my behavior and medications. Managing diabetes involves constant monitoring and modifications of diet, exercise and medication. Recently I had added a drug with weight loss potential and have lost over 15 pounds in four months. The next goal is to test how that affects other factors involved.
In the end, it’s about finding solutions to negative feedback and the data that’s been excavated from it. Constructive criticism offers an opportunity for improvement. On the flipside, when feedback is irrelevant, it’s okay to let it go. What long experience has taught me is that getting defensive or ignoring feedback won’t improve anything. Instead, let’s use it to inspire understanding, explore alternatives, and craft better solutions.
Dr. Bert Shlensky, President of www.startupconnection.net, offers experience, skills, and a team devoted to developing and executing winning strategies. Our strategy includes clear steps, and over 150 free articles and templates to facilitate your efforts and guide your process. We’re here to help you get on track and stay there as you move forward. You might start with our quick video: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dhZ3LvSmZfw
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